A 35-year-old party activist has received a formal written warning today after yet again mistaking a work meeting for a party.
The activist, who has worked at the treasury for the last two and a bit years, has been repeatedly told to stop attending work meetings in a party hat and letting off party poppers while his coworkers are making significant decisions. He has particularly been told to lay off bringing forward his agenda for a 25 minute piss up, as an end of meeting cool down.
HR representative Jacob told us, “It’s been difficult to be understanding towards him because let’s face it, it’s VERY difficult to mistake a work meeting for a party. Particularly when your job title is party activist. Yet he keeps on doing it, time after time - like a lightweight.
“I was actually in the first meeting where he got it wrong; he tried to get the chief advisor to get up and join his conga while they were explaining why we were 10% below forecast in the opinion polls."
“He looked genuinely shocked when Dominic wouldn’t join him. It’s like he genuinely believed he had been invited to a party. What sort of moron thinks like that?" said Matt Hancock; continuing "meetings should be strictly 1 to 1 especially in the office."
As for me, well I can’t imagine anyone who is even borderline competent at their job could ever mistake a work meeting for a party. That would be ridiculous, right?
I am sure they’d like to get rid of him, to be honest, but he’s well connected and some important people seem to like his eccentric style – plus he went to the ‘right’ school and all that – so we’ll have to wait for the higher-ups to realise he’s a complete liability.
Judging by the looks on their faces this morning, it won’t be long before he’s shoved out the door.
Sampled from Newsthump